Feeds:
Posts
Comments

Posts Tagged ‘Surfing’

I hate Idiots

Posted in Anger, Life, Surfing, tagged , , , , , , , , on October 26, 2010| 4 Comments »

I hate Idiots, but I especially hate idiots that surf and surf badly at that.  All day at work today while I was in the midst of making 75 pizzas by 11am and then from 11-1:30 while I was serving them and from 2-3:30 while prepping for tomorrow’s rotisserie the only thing on my mind was getting out of there to take advantage of the NW wind swell/groundswell combo.  Finally when quiting time came I was out of the kitchen faster then a fat kid runs to eat a piece of cake.

I went straight to Rincon where I was let down for the second straight day in a row (read Surf Log for more on that session).  From there I cruised to Pitas for a hopeful repeat of yesterday.  It was a little bit bigger probably around chest to head with even the occasional bigger set.  There was a little cross chop on the face but from the looks of it the top of the point had some solid killable walls pushing through with only six guys on it and it appeared they were missing more waves then they were surfing.  I was on it.

I got out in the lineup and was having a pretty decent time hitting beyond vertical backside reo’s.  After an hour of this about four other guys came out, two of whom fit into that bro, I think I surf well but I look like shit category.  My least favorite of all the surfing genders.  Of course these idiots come out and immediately start paddling every one too deep.  I was having more fun riding the inside double ups anyhow to be bothered with the set waves which were mushier and I could not be bothered with jockeying with average surfers who think they are in a world tour event or something.

While Im sitting on the inside relishing this section of the wave a good size set most likely overhead came in.  Mr. Bro decided he was going to take off on the biggest close out of the set.  I paddled deep to get out of his way but sometimes at Pitas the bowl shifts back deep, backs off and then doubles out and closes out like something you would expect to see from shore dump.  This was the case with this particular wave.  All of a sudden bro was dropping in right on my head.

Now he had plenty of time to see that A) this wave was going to dump and not be worth his while, B) even if it was not a close out the drop itself was well out of his personal skill set and C) there was a surfer directly in his path (me) and pull out of the wave.  Of course “stupid is as stupid does” brostapha air drops right onto my head.  Luckily as I was about to duck dive I realized I was more likely then not about to get decapitated by inferior surfing ability and ditched swimming as deep as I could to save my own skin.

I knew I would come out unscathed but my board on the other hand took the full brunt of the hit.  When I surfaced I found my relatively new board sliced clean through in two places and a third hole half way through as well.  The two worst slashes measured longer then four inches a piece long.  My board was trashed.  Bro looked at me was like “Dude are you ok”.  I responded “Im fine but my board is trash”.  He retorted “duh, sorry but I got stuck and could not turn and had to take the air drop”.  I looked him square in the eye and said “Its kind of hard to do anything when you paddle for an obvious close out, FUCKING DONKEY”.  Upon which I splashed some water in his face and took my next wave in ending my session an hour early and ruined what was turning out to be a great board.

I hate bad surfers, but more then that I hate stupid surfers.  Sure I have had a few collisions in my day but those were more or less due to poor paddling decisions on a paddlers side or miscommunication in a game of chicken.  In most cases with the exception of one everyone came out alright anyhow.  This is like the fourth time since I have been out here in California that I have had a board destroyed by some jack ass.  There was a time when the line ups used to be full of only competent surfers and were run and dominated by the elite.

Back then shit like this rarely happened.  These days what can one expect in the era of the kook.  The sport of kings has been degraded down to the sport of clowns.  FUCKING DONKEYS, BROS, YUPPIES, RECREATIONALS, WHATEVERS, SHOULDNT YOU GOT BACK TO PLAYING GOLF OR TENNIS OR TOUCH FOOTBALL OR WHATEVER YOU MEATBALLS DO THAT IS COOL ACCORDING TO GQ MAGAZINE AND LEAVE SURFING ALONE.  YOU DONT SEE ME DONNING A POLO SHIRT AND TRY TO GET INTO A COUNTRY CLUB DO YOU? GO FUCKING HOME.

 

The first picture is before the incident the other two show the extent of the damage.

 

Read Full Post »

When We Become Food

Posted in Deep Thoughts, Life, Surfing, tagged , , , , , on October 24, 2010| 11 Comments »

By now I think the word has gotten out in surf communities up and down California and around the US as well.  This past Friday 10/22/10 a surfer (well body boarder to be exact, not that it makes a difference) was attacked here in Santa Barbara County up at Surf Beach, a meager surfing out post up in the northern portion of the County, 30 miles or so north of point conception.  Im not going to talk of the particulars of the incident because I was not there and only know what I read similar to you.  If your interested in the particulars click here: http://www.surfline.com/surf-news/shark-attack-at-vandenberg–ucsb-surfer-loses-leg-and-dies-from-blood-loss_49145/.

 

For me and many of my surfing brethren up here in Santa Barbara this attack came as quite a shock and rude awakening.  Sure I have heard plenty of shark attack stories on the news, heard the second and third party exaggerated horror stories even gave my sympathies to Bethany Hamilton.  But overall it was all second hand smoke.  This one was very different.  Some one was taken in my own backyard at a surf spot that I on occasion surf.

 

Shit I almost went up north to surf that very day but at the last minute found out I had to go do ding work at J7 so I decided not to bother.  Never before in my life has an attack happened in the near vicinity to my personal surfing scope.  All I can say is it’s a heavy realization.  The men in gray suits are out there and you never know when they are going to strike.  I could become food just as much as the next schmoo.

 

Then I started thinking man Im never going to surf up at Surf Beach again.  Yet it is a key summer spot exposed to swell from all angles.  On further introspection I decided that yeah I probably will go back.  I have never lived my life in fear and I don’t intend to as of late.  As this crazy body boarder I met in Oz once said “I reckon mate if you get taken and live to tell about it you wont ever have to buy a beer again, and if you don’t well no worries then”.

Ahh good old surf beach, apparently there are angry locals both outside and inside the water.

Read Full Post »

Why You Should Root For Kelly Slater (UCB)

Posted in Surfing, User Choice BLog, tagged , , , on October 14, 2010| 4 Comments »

Well I have to commend everyone for stepping up the ante in the UCB race this quarter.  I have gotten so many submissions it made picking a winner this week rather challenging.  I don’t want to sound like a whinny bitch but if we could try and use surfingruinedmylife.com comments to post future submissions I would be greatly appreciative.  You see word press, my server allows me to compile all comments onto one page making it very easy to sort through all of your entries.

It’s a bit more time consuming when I have to check through days of face book comments, emails, myspace, etc.  I will still take submissions through those mediums but I definitely prefer it if you post here.  Its really easy all you have to do is set up a user name and password.  It only takes like a minute of you time and then you can leave lude comments on my blog whenever you like.

This weeks victory goes to Nick the Kook who suggested I write about Slater’s 10th title run.  At the time of his posting I was not even considering this topic, but just recently Kelly won the Portugal event of the world tour bringing him within spitting distance of title number 10.  His clinching it is almost eminent.

Slater gets a bad rep sometimes in surfing with people claiming they are tired of him winning or that he gets over scored or is a sell out.  I have heard everything.  Fuck man the guy rips, flat out rips.  He has dominated the sport now for over 20 years.  The guy is a living legend.

Not to mention he is one of the coolest people to surf with in the water.  At the most crowded days at both Rincon and Malibu he never drops in on anyone despite the fact that people will burn him out of spite.  Even when such an instance occurs Kelly is still smiling.  He is a true testament to the human spirit and that anything really is possible.

Here was a poor kid from a broken home growing up in south Florida surfing the crappiest waves ever.  From that he managed to break every record in professional surfing.  He misses round one of events cause he is off scoring waves someplace else.  He brought surfing into the limelight through his dominance.  Everyone knows who Kelly Slater is even people who know very little about surfing at all.

He was once voted one of Time Magazine’s most beautiful people, was on network television, toured in a terrible rock band, dated super models.  How can you hate on a guy like that.  Kelly is living a dream and if you have a dream too then there is no reason to be angry at a person living his.  At 38 years old he has shown us all that its possible to high performance surf well into our later years.  Thanks to Slater you don’t have to stop doing airs at thirty.

New School, Old School, Mod col, whatever, Slater has dominated them all.  I think we will be hard pressed to see anyone for a long time rip down the dynasty Kelly Slater has built.  When he takes the world title for the tenth time no one will be happier for him then me.  Every time Im doing something hard and want to give up I always think about Slater and how hard it must have been for him to remain dominant all these years and I put my head down and keep at it.  Thank you Slater for giving me something to believe in.

 

After all these years of winning he is still stoked.

 

 

 

Who says Slater cant keep up with the kids?

 

Read Full Post »

The Essence of the Backside Bottom Turn

Posted in Surf Tips, Surfing, User Choice BLog, tagged , , , , on October 7, 2010| 1 Comment »

Mark Occhilupo has arguably one of the best backsides in surfing, ever.

This weeks UCB makes a victor of Kooky Kyle whom is getting yet again back on a roll with two wins in a row.  If he gets a hat trick (three in a row) he will be awarded an extra half point.  He suggested I right about the essence of the backside bottom turn.  Since it is officially Rincon season I figured why not.

Backside surfing is the proverbial double edged sword.  Those who have it mastered are either goofy foots living in the northern hemisphere or world class surfers in general.  Everyone respects a surfer with a strong backside.  It’s the corner stone to solid surfing, the ability to go both left and right with out a care in the world.

 

For me being a goofy foot born and bred in the mainly right dominated beach break of northern New Jersey backside surfing was never a consideration but just another instinct like breathing.  The funny thing is I surf with so many people, especially here in Santa Barbara who always are hesitant to go backside.  It seems too, that regular foots will always take a right over a left when they can find them, while a goofy will take a right over left at times.

 

Personally I almost find it more enjoyable to have my back against the wall.  Surfing backside allows me in many cases to fit better into the barrel and draw that picturesque backside bottom turn.  The backside bottom turn may be the one of the most ascetic yet highly functional moves in surfing.   I mean lets face it good backside surfing is completely based off your ability to get out in front of the wave any way.  How is that done?  The backside bottom turn.

 

I find it to be one of my favorite feelings, next to getting barreled and doing a massive air.  There is nothing like the way a perfect backside bottom turn rings home through your lions.  The initial drop straight down in front of the wave pulling as far straight as you can before losing the wave.  Then at the moment when it feels like all could be lost, make it or break it, you lean back on your inside rail with your back foot, un weight your front foot and all of a sudden with all the natural pull of the ocean and your body weight you feel the inertia of being catapulted back into the steadily crashing lip.

 

The size, length and shape of the wave will distinguish the extent and gnarlieness of the turn itself.  After all you can do the best bottom turn in the world but if it does not amount to anything then it was all for nil.  Its winter time now so for me it is finally back to nothing but long fast hard backside bottom turns for ridiculous amounts of distance at many of the various points around, but mainly reserved for Rincon.  I love winter.

Here is my lousy backside bottom turn.

Here it is closer up.

Read Full Post »

I’ll Have My Cake and Eat it Too (UCB)

Posted in Surfing, User Choice BLog, tagged , , , , , , , , , , on October 1, 2010| Leave a Comment »

This week Kooky Kyle strikes back getting a star on the board.  Got to be honest people its still a two way street between Kooky and Mauriello.  Now that we are myspace free there really is no reason not to play.  Kooky asked what I would rather surf, Sand sucking barrels or perfect lined up waves such as Trestles.

The answer my friend is that I will take both.  As a matter of fact I live on a wave, you may have heard of it, Sand Spit that offers both sand sucking barrels and rip able walls.  Also Rincon on Low tide will barrel like a motherfucker and also allow for plenty of performance.  El Capitan is a crazy heavy barrel that also offers high performance surfing.  I live within a 15 mile radius of all these waves.

There are waves like this all over the world.  J-Bay and Snapper Rocks offer great barrels and rip able sections.  If you give me the choice of Beach, Reef, or Point Break, I will always take the point break no contest.  On a beach break you may get a handful of days a year where every wave is perfect but 90% of the time your bobbing and weaving and fishing through close outs lucky to find a half dozen good ones at best.  Meanwhile at a point even the not so perfect waves are pretty damn killable.  As far as barreling reefs go I find them fun to visit but would get bored of just pulling in everyday.

Sand Spit doing its thing.

Snapper Rocks, barrel and performance.

El Capitan, Need I say anymore?

Read Full Post »

« Newer Posts