Surfing Ruined My Life

Opening day or blog might I add of the winter and final quarter of the 2011 UCB series.  As of press time it is a three way tie for the year end championship between Nick the Kook, Kooky Kyle and John Mauriello.  Now all three of these guys are seasoned pros at this UCB thing.  That does not mean you can’t swoop in there and steal the quarter.  If that was to happen then we will have a blog off the first week of January to crown a champion.  Remember first prize is a self expense paid trip to Lisanti Land.

Also I am writing this months Power of Ten list in the coming week so if you have yet to submit a list do it asap.   Enough business.  Lets get down to the first installment of the quarter.  Mauriello came out of the gates swinging and it paid off with the first win garnishing him with 1.5 points.  He asked I describe just exactly what a “Fifi” in Lisanti-isms or Lisanti Speak as I like to call it.  I sort of have my own little dialog of sayings and vocabulary strange to the world outside of the small sphere of influence that is Lisanti Land.  I am not going to tackle all of my strange speak but I will address what a “Fifi” is considering I have mentioned the term several times over the last few weeks.

A few years ago I found myself at a loss to define a relationship that was more then a friend with benefits but not quite a girlfriend/boyfriend/significant other.  Significant other,  what is that term exactly.  I believe everyone I hold dear to me in my life is significant and other just sounds so cold.  I was sitting in a dinner at 3am in New Jersey after a late night at work with a very good friend of mine who went by the name Troll, a nick name bestowed upon him by yours truly.  He was seeing this chick for over two months.  They were sleeping together but were not girlfriend and boyfriend.

They were not quite fuck buddies cause both felt for one another, yet they were not exclusive as well.  I have been in said situation a few times and it is in my opinion one of the most frustrating ambiguous positions there  is in life.  I think it puts a strain on both parties of the relationship (I mean relationship in the most simple way of the definition).  At that point the alliance between the two can and will go one of two ways.  It will either end in utter ruin or an actual loving affinity for one another.  In my case it has always been the former to hold true.

At this late night meal where I happily enjoyed an over sized piece of Boston Cream Pie, my diner standard, I came up with the term Fifi for his situation.  Unfortunately for him his contact with his Fifi went just like my own experiences with such by way of the Indian.  Where did I get this term from you ask.

Well it all goes back to the film That Thing You Do  staring Tom Hanks.  It is a in my opinion a rather enjoyable movie and totally worth a watch if you have never seen it before.  There is this scene towards the end of the flick where one of the characters is checking out of the hotel they were staying at and was looking for his friends. The bell hop said all of them had split, but “Their little Fifi was still around”.  In the film “Fifi” was this chick that was seeing this character’s friend, but they had broken up.  Through out the entire film one could see there was something between the two of them.  That is how I came up with the term.

I think it describes the connection rather well.  “Fifi” is like this fun non-committal sounding name.  It was also the name of Pluto’s girlfriend in the old Walt Disney cartoons.  For me the term works well and has become accepted by my friends for this meaning.  Its better then Urban Dictionary meaning in which a “Fifi” is a masturbation device created by prison inmates by taking a sock and filling it with Vaseline or toothpaste.  If you like my little term, more proof of my personal detachment from the world and further proof of my own insanity feel free to use it. I do.  Mauriello, the man who is the benefactor of this post now happily calls his former “Fifi” girlfriend.  See folks not everything ends up in flames or maybe it is too early to tell with them.   All I have to say is that I hope only the best for the pair.  So now you know what I am talking about when I use the term “Fifi”.  If some guy fresh out of prison uses it I would be a little more skeptical of what definition he is referring to.

Here is that scene I from That Thing You Do that I was talking about: