Feeds:
Posts
Comments

Posts Tagged ‘Cinco De Mayo’

Of Things to Come…

Posted in Deep Thoughts, Life, News From Lisanti Land, Surfing, tagged , , , , , , , , , , on May 6, 2012| 13 Comments »

Happy Cinco de Mayo everyone although it is sort of a bull shit holiday that has been over dramatized and commercialized by America in order to sell tequila and cheap shitty Mexican beer.  Seriously Mexicans don’t even really celebrate it.  Many believe today is Mexican Independence Day.  If you thought such you would be wrong .  Mexican Independence Day is actually September 16th.  Cinco de Mayo actually celebrates some battle the Mexican Army won against the French in 1862.  Now it is just another bullshit drinking holiday so that the general public can feel better about going out and getting absolutely shit faced.  

I for one was planning on jumping on the bandwagon.  I mean who am I to pass up an excuse to drink?  Then as I thought about all the fucking idiot amateurs that were going to be out tonight, the incessant lines and excessive cover charges for that reason I quickly got over it.  I went out last night and had an average time at best.  I think I will leave tonight to all fools who need an excuse to get drunk rather then be honest with themselves that they enjoy to get plastered from time to time.   What is with all these drinking holidays falling on a weekend this year?  First St. Pats, now Cinco de Mayo.  They are way more fun on weekdays so everyone who works a normal Monday through Friday week can feel what its like to work the entire day with hangover like us weekend workers do.

America Fuck Yeah!

 

Enough about tonight before I change my mind and cruise to the bar with the idiots and on to my initial reason for writing.  A blog ago or so I wrote about my current lot in life and feelings (see Food for Thought).  In this blog I am going to explore some of my thoughts about moving forward in life.  Take some stock in the direction I would like to see things move for me.  

The Path to Enlightenment

“Before enlightenment, chop wood carry water.  After enlightenment, chop wood carry water”.  This is an old Buddhist proverb I picked up in the brief survey I gave to the study of the religion.  I took from them what suited me and left behind the organization.  My religious views are not to be explored in this blog.  I feel this is a really good mantra to try and follow.  One who is truly enlightened knows he must keep at the path that got him to that point.  

I am constantly striving to find out more about myself, who I am, what I am about and what I am capable of.  I don’t believe many understand such entities of themselves or want to for that matter.  When you start digging into your mind, heart and soul honestly there is much there that is amazing, alarming and somewhat a bit unsettling.  Once you open the flood gates its not like you can turn back.  You must keep moving forward.  I have discovered a bunch about myself in the past few years and even more over the last year.  

The more I learn the less I know. “The wise man knows that he knows nothing at all”.  One thing I do know is that I know what I stand for as a person and what I do not.  I also know that I will not compromise this for anyone or anything and I never have.  I rocked long hair for nearly 16 years despite pressure from my ex-wife, family, society, jobs, etc.  Yeah I finally did cut my hair, but for me.  I entered a new chapter in my life and wanted a new hairstyle to go with it.  I plan on continuing this existential journey through my character and how it interacts both positive and adverse in our society making adjustments where necessary to suit me and no one else.  No one can tell you what you need or want besides you.  That my friends is how I intend to live out my days. 

The Short List
 

These are some things I wish to accomplish over the coming months or at the very least better myself in.  If you don’t have some type of direction then you are just running around like dog chasing his tail.  Here is to moving vertically.

Get Back into Music
I play the saxophones rather well and enjoy doing it.  At one point it was my job and that basically ruined the whole thing for me.  After a very short stint in that industry I burnt out and went rouge.  That was over ten years ago.  I have never stopped playing.  I did a little work last summer in the musical theatre genre that was a blast (see “A Trip Back East” Blog for more on that).  I really want to get back into Jazz.  I’m not even talking about performance.  I would just love to meet a few like minded people who would be stoked on pulling out a real book and blowing from time to time.  So if your in the Santa Barbara area and have a yearning to play some of that Jazz music please hit me up.

Learn to Speak Italian
This is more of a necessity to go with one of my other more long term directions, which I will discuss later on.  I am not sure as of late how to accomplish this task.  At the moment I am leading towards taking classes at Santa Barbara City College.  I was also thinking about trying some of those language tapes as well.  Any suggestions would be very helpful.  Maybe I will just kidnap an Italian, lock him/her in my hall closet, force feed him/her cat food and speak conversational Italian with me on a daily basis.  I could def think of one Italian here in SB that deserves such treatment.
 

Go Surfing As Much As Possible
This plan has already been put into action.  I have been really lazy as far as surfing is concerned over the past year.  Yeah I don’t do it competitively or professionally anymore, but it is my best source of enjoyment, exercise and therapy.  I know we are steadily approaching our off season here in the 805.  There are still plenty of waves that can be enjoyed by the intrepid and willing.  I was once both and want to be once again.  Its always more fun when your out there.  Visit the surf log for my daily surfing escapades and more.

Time to get my grovel on…

Read More Books
I have been very, very lazy on the reading front.  I used get to read nearly two novels a month.  Now I am down to around three a year.  This really puts a damper on my thirst to read as many great works of literature as possible.  I have a rather extensive collection of classics many of which I have sadly yet to read.  

Write More
This one goes all around from blogging, to my novel, to another writing project I have been working, to a possible cooking show my buddy and I are working on pitching, to short stories. I am also in the process of a SurfingRuinedMyLife.net redesign.   

Explore more of the greater Santa Barbara Area
It was not long ago, maybe two years to be somewhat exact that my boy Brennan and I set out to attack a list of 101 free things to do in Santa Barbara.  In the process we did and saw many really fun and amazing things.  Since then I have still been striking out to explore my home albeit not as frequently.  There are plenty of places with in a fifty mile radius or so that I have to check off my list and this may be the summer for it.  No matter what I’m sure you will get to read about the results here.

Just another Santa Barbara Adventure!

 Finish the Coffee Table
Ok this project has been going on for almost two years now and the odds of its completion slim, me ruining it in the attempt very good or finding a better one on craigslist most likely.  You never know at the moment I am feeling very ambitious. We never thought the renovations on the Lisanti Palace would come to pass either.

The current state of my coffee table:(

 

Drink and Party Less
How am I going to accomplish all this you ask?  Well one of the things I am going to cut out is the number of hours I spend per week getting hammered both downtown and at home.  When you drink and party all night you sleep and are sick all day or even days depending. The amount of money such a life style amounts to is preposterous.   That does not mean I am going all Mormon on you.  All it means is I am going to bring things down to a safer more manageable level before I end up dead by 40.  Everything in moderation after all.

The high life…Looks enticing huh? Its not all its cracked up to be.

Grow a Mustache

I DON’T THINK SO…Been there done that scared myself and everyone around me for one week too long.

That is the meat of what I think the “Summer of Alf” (what I am billing the summer of 2012) is going to be all about.  Stay tuned for some of my long term accomplishments soon…And of course regular updates, departments and other fun from Lisanti Land.


Read Full Post »

The Dance Off

Posted in User Choice BLog, tagged , , , , , , , , , , , , on June 6, 2011| 9 Comments »

This week’s UCB or last weeks actually considering I did not get a chance to write it till now, makes a winner of Nick the Kook.  He asked that I write a tale about him.  Now there are literally hundreds of stupid Nick the Kook stories in the Lisanti memory bank.  Besides the fact that you can almost count on Nick doing something completely stupid eight out of ten times, but the guy spent probably more time with me then I spent with my ex-wife circa 2003-2007.

 

The kid hung around the surf shop all day long 7 days a week when I worked there, usually surfed with me after, then went skating with me that night.  We even started traveling together.  Kook and I have racked up a ridiculous amount of friend hours and I would have to say a retarded story would take place involving one or both of us 95% of the time.

 

When asked to pick a story its not very easy.  I mean I could write an entire segment, maybe start a new blog even about the adventures of Chris Lisanti and Nick the Kook.  There are that many and since we still get together from time to time there are more to come.   For this blog I thought I would tell the tale of a Cinco de Mayo party, a bottle of Agave and an incident of ill treatment to a piñata.  Yeah you’re going to want to keep on reading for this one.  I know I did not want to tell negative stories here anymore, but if a story of my own stupidity and immaturity deters at least one person from drinking too much then it was worth the humiliation.

 

For a span of three years I was on this wild house party kick.  In New Jersey that is the staple for most alcoholism especially in the winter months.  I guess this took place around 2007.  I could be wrong on the exact date so if anyone out there remembers feel free to correct me in the comments.  My good friend Nick Kiefer one of the most talented graphic artists/photographers I know, now turned hipster musician was throwing a Cinco De Mayo party at his parents house.

 

Now when I roll up to a party I also come with an entourage, rapper style.  This was actually the very end of my house party days thus I was rolling lighter then usual with just Nick the Kook, Sindia and myself.  I also brought along in proper fashion for the occasion a bottle of Mexican Agave (which is like 80 proof) a gift provided by my parents from a recent trip to Mexico.

 

Upon entry I open the Agave and it is shots all around till the bottle was cooked.  Let me mention that Kiefer’s parents were in attendance at this party and had some friends of their own at there as well.  Now Agave for those of you who don’t know is the sugar component put into tequila.  I think by now most of you know what happens to me when tequila is involved, I get crazy.  Well Agave has an even higher sugar content meaning an even nuttier Lisanti.

 

After four shots I was feeling pretty good, and ready to take the party up to high gear.  At this point it may have been about ten at night.  Kook and I decided to get people dancing in the living room.  I think Kiefer’s sister and maybe two of her friends and Sindia briefly humored us.  Shortly after it went from a dance circle to a drunken Nick the Kook vs Lisanti dance off, which basically ended in Kiefer’s parents big screen television nearly falling over crushing the both of us and ruining the set.  Luckily Sindia stepped in being the responsible one and put a stop to our stupidity.  Literally we looked like complete buffoons failing around at a lame attempt of a break dance off.

 

From there I am pretty sure I ran around the house making imbecilic, incoherent conversation with random people while chugging way too many beers.  Sindia was embarrassed, Kiefer was sorry he invited me and I am pretty sure his parents contemplated calling the police on more then one instance that night.  The Kook tried to get with Kiefer’s now ex-girl friend (not from that event) and as a result was never allowed over Kiefer’s house again.  I’m not certain but I think he also tried to get with Nick’s younger sister and mom as well.

 

We were a pair of real classy guys him and I.  Finally the night ended with the unveiling of this sombrero piñata.  Nothing makes a drunken Cinco de Mayo party better then smashing a piñata except I think the only people drunk there were the Kook and I.  A few people got their hits in on it and then it was my turn.  Now why anyone at my level of intoxication would have been handed a wiffle ball bat and blind folded is beyond me, but that is exactly what happened.

 

I came out swinging like a mad man but was way to inebriated to even come close to hitting the thing.  I am pretty sure I fell over in the process also.  Angry and a bit humiliated I ripped the piñata off the ceiling and smashed it against the wall.  Candy fell out all over the place and then I slipped and fell on top of it all, smashing most of it under my body.

 

Ten minutes later I found myself throwing up all over Kiefer’s bathroom, followed by the front lawn and the entire car ride home, while Sindia drove.  We left Kook behind who as I stated earlier perpetuated the losing task of attempting to get with any lady left at the party.  I got home, fell out of the passenger seat of the car and passed out in the marshland besides my house.  Sindia left me there, pay back for the embarrassing evening and leaving her in the backyard a year ago when she got embarrassingly drunk.

 

The funny thing is I used to be proud of this story.  I thought it was a really winner to earn me browning points with others.  I always thought when I told it people were laughing with me, well I finally know now they were merely just laughing at me like I was some type of circus clown.  Part of me still thinks partying hard is a ton of fun, until I sit down and read what I write.  Then I realize all I am doing is making a fool of myself.  “He who walks in the darkness does not know where he goes” John 12:35.

Read Full Post »