Surfing Ruined My Life

Im an Ashanti fan so sue me.  I think her vocals are pretty tight, she is good to look at and her grooves are solid.  Her music speaks to me as of lately.  I have been playing her on loop from my Ipod the last few weeks.  This is one of her weaker songs from the Declaration album entitled Struggle.  It actually came on my shuffle while I was sanding boards yesterday and I had never really listened to the lyrics before, usually I always skip it because of the cheesy key board intro.  I must of been the middle of something that required the use of both my hands cause I let it play out.

Turns out the lyrics really reflected my current emotions and feelings.  I ended up repeating it three times, then listened to it again this morning.  Pretty much everyone around me right now is looking at me like door mat and believes that I have completely disrespected myself.  They don’t fully understand my situation, heck I don’t understand it even the slightest.  My world is in complete disarray right now and I have to just have faith and trust in the lord, in myself and in the other person whom I care so deeply for.

So yeah what I’m doing right now is crazy and it hurts, but it feels good too.  I don’t know how things are going to play out.  All I can do is stick by my convictions a bit longer despite how pathetic it looks and be strong.  If your still at loss to understand why I’m traveling down the path that I am listen to the lyrics of this song closely and maybe you will see.  This captain is going down with the ship.