Last night while shopping at Rite Aid I had a pleasant memory from my past; The Cadbury Egg. When I was a kid I loved these mother fucking nougat filled eggs. For years I have been enjoyably eating the shit out of them. Last night I was floating around the popular pharmaceutical emporium waiting for Heather to get all the random beauty accessories she needs on a very regular basis. To my credit I needed some bar soap and liquid hand soap for my kitchen since I have been mixing the old one with water for the past two weeks and now there pretty much isn’t any soap left. It was time.
Anyway as I was meandering around the store like a creeper when I came across a display of Cadbury Eggs. I thought why not relive a bit of confectionery nostalgia. I grabbed an egg and brought it and my menagerie of soap products to the counter. When the girl, who may or may not have been retarded (she thought Heather and I were brother and sister??? WTF) rang up my Cadbury Egg the fucker cost $1.19 plus tax!!!! 1.19!!!!! Are you fucking kiding me? They used to be a quarter. I bought one like three years ago and it was like seventy five cents.
At that moment I realized that inflation and the American economy had passed me by. In the past five years my salary has only increased by 25% meanwhile the Cadbury Egg in just three years has increased 65%. I find it a bit disturbing and very fucked up that a chocolate covered egg with a nougat inside that somewhat resembles dirty jizz has manged to make more money then I have, a skilled laborer. Then I thought further into about how little the skilled laborer is worth to America. There was a time in this country where everyone made a fair living wage and could buy all the tasty chocolate eggs they wanted. Now 90 percent of us starve and work out asses off to do so while a very privileged 10% hold all the cards.
What is this the fucking middle ages? Are we all really just serfs working the land for our rich lords and lady land owners. Fuck, every year my rent goes up 100 bucks a month while all I get is a 15 cents raise for my efforts. This shit is fucked. I am not asking to be paid a million bucks or something. All I would like is to be able to cover all my bills every month and to have a little fun money. Fuck you Cadbury and your tasty over priced jizzy eggs.
Surfing Ruined My Life 